I wrap my fingers around the bar, and drop my butt down. Back straight. As I straighten my legs, the bar travels across my shins, I pull towards me, as the bar weakly touches my ribs and falls to the ground.
115-lb squat clean. No rep.
Before I have a chance to label my performance as pathetic, I remember that I actually have to snap my body under the bar at the exact moment after the pull.
Once again – set up, drop my butt down. Straighten the legs, pull, snap under in a squat – muscle memory kicks in and the bar lies securely across my chest. I easily stand up. 115-lb squat is light. So light.
I’ve gone rogue this week. I went back to CrossFit.
After running my ultra marathon, and completing Tough Mudder in drizzling rain in New Jersey, I am feeling burnt out. I’m just… tired. Not tired physically, but tired psychologically. I feel like I have been covered in mud for the past five years. I feel like I’ve been running in loops towards the finish line for the past five years.
Thankfully, I have zero desire to sit on a couch and eat Cheezies.
Someone said: “Do what makes you feel powerful, not powerless”. The last few races of the season made me feel more powerless, than powerful. The bar, on the other hand… The bar never fails to make me feel powerful. Doesn’t matter how heavy or light the plates are.
I miss the bar. While I had a steady routine with squats and deadlifts lately, I do miss more skilled movements with the bar.
And boy, am I rusty. My first attempt at 115-lb squat clean says so.
So I picked up a “check us out for 7 days free” flyer at a neighbouring CrossFit box, and threw myself back into the world of double-unders and cultish t-shirts. For now.
In a week, my butt will be on a plane heading to Europe. Gluten-free and vegan this trip will definitely be NOT.
I think I can use a vacation. And I also feel like being a girl for a bit. Make-up and mud do not mix very well. I miss wearing make-up. And heels. I miss feeling pretty. [I will never live this last remark down, will I?]
Let’s hope muscle memory kicks in, when it comes to applying eye shadow.
60 sec plank
30 sec rest
40 sec each side side plank
rest 2 min
power clean complex
20 115-lb squat cleans
20 pull-ups (subbed to inverted rows)
20 HSPU (subbed to push-ups with resistance band)